My last job experience was not good. I got fired. It left me jaded and hurt and feeling like a failure. It’s been almost two years and guess what? I still feel like that.
But this week is the start of something different—a new job—and although it’s only a part time gig at a local coffee shop, instead of looking forward to it, I’m afraid of it. Cynical from past experience and current writing rejections, I can’t see opportunity anymore. All I see is a fresh chance to fail. And it makes me sad. I don’t want to feel like I do.
I’m not interested in getting pats on the back or hearing, “Keep it up, keep going, it will happen one day,” because the truth is, maybe it will, but maybe it won’t. I don’t want to keep being stifled by the pressure of pursuing things I’m not sure about—I want to go after what I know for sure. I’m tired of being mocked by sandwiches I haven’t made yet—ones that say, “You’ll get it wrong. You always do. You couldn’t do the last thing right, you probably can’t do this right either.”
For once I want to believe in the truth, that no matter what happens in any area of my life—whether I fail or get picked, whether I can do it right or I can’t, whether I make sandwiches and coffee or write or clean house or use the degrees hanging on my wall—He loves me and He has a plan for me, every day, every hour.
He’s really all that matters. He can use me wherever I am, I just have to be willing to let go—of the box I’ve put Him in, of my pre-conceived ideas about what I should have already achieved by this point in my life, of the failure that I’ve let cripple me up to this point.
It doesn’t matter where you work or what you wear or what you’ve messed up before, what matters is the choice you make right now, in this moment, in this day.
It’s your decision—serve Him fully where you are, no matter what that looks like, or focus on where you’re not, where you may never be, on the sandwiches you haven’t even made yet.
Have you put God in a box? Are you so blinded by past failure that you can’t see the opportunity right now? It doesn’t matter if it’s small or totally different than anything you’ve ever done before—God will use you where you are if you let Him. He has a purpose for these moments—one that’s not just about you.
I will not be mocked by things that haven’t happened yet. I refuse to see only my potential to fail. I choose to focus on Him right here, right now, even though it looks totally different than I hoped, imagined, or planned.
I’m going after what I know for sure—He’s here with me and He is working a plan, and no matter what that looks like for me right now, I will follow. Because faithfulness in the now is what makes our tomorrows. Determination to serve Him in the little, in the overlooked, through the failure, in spite of fear is what creates future opportunity. Tomorrow is made up of what you do today, so trust, obey, keep going no matter the outcome.
Be encouraged today. Don’t allow what you think your life should look like to render you ineffective. Remember God’s love, His plan—He never fails.
I have been deprived of peace; I have forgotten what prosperity is. So I say, “My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped from the Lord.” I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall. I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me. Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “ The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him. – Lamentations 3:17-25 (NIV)
Linking with:
L.L. for On, In, & Around on Mondays
Joan for The Beauty in His Grip
Jen for Soli Deo Gloria
Laura for Playdates at the Wellspring
Michelle for Hear it Sunday, Use it Monday
Carissa for Miscellany Monday
Joan for The Beauty in His Grip
Jen for Soli Deo Gloria
Laura for Playdates at the Wellspring
Michelle for Hear it Sunday, Use it Monday
Carissa for Miscellany Monday
8 comments:
I SO needed this! Thank you for sharing these encouraging words. God has used them to speak to me today. Bless you!
Deidra, I can relate to a time when my past failures and mistakes seemed to hold me captive. One thing that always encourages me is looking in Scripture and seeing all the mistake makers God used to spread His message of hope. He specializes in resurrecting and redeeming the broken and the messed up!! Thanks so much for linking up
In this fullness of surrender, I think He does things that far supersede what we could imagine because we begin to start putting so much emphasis on self and put everything in Christ. I can't wait to see what develops with you and in you as you start on this new journey.
I hope you enjoy your new job, and you know I can't help but say I know there's more ahead for you writing-wise. I believe in you, D., whether you decide to clean houses or write stories or sing songs. There is a bigger plan, and we'll both find our way eventually :) Love you!
I wasn't fired from the job, years ago...but I was going to be refitted...or reassigned...but I had quit first. Then found that out. I still think about that job more than all the successful ones that I've had. It is hard to fail. And hard to keep on believing at times.
We often build our greatest successes from the ruins of our failures.
"Mocked by sandwiches I haven't made." I'm going to remember that one! You're going to find some stories in that coffee shop. I just know it.
This is one truth you can take to the bank :). Trusting that He has positioned me right where I am for a reason? This takes practice. Good for you for stepping out and trusting the Lord to restore. I'll be praying so many wonderful things for you in the new job!
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