I've Got it from Here

We spent the weekend preparing – buying snacks and supplies, organizing, packing, going over lists. He was glad to let me help. I’ve been on trips like this before. I know the things he’ll need, the possibilities to be considered. But while he was thinking of the bus ride, the fun activities, the time he’d spend with friends, I was thinking of provision, making sure he had the resources necessary to make his trip calm and comfortable.

At check-in we turned in his bags and got new instructions, “Go up the stairs and find your group. Wait there for information about loading buses.” I followed him toward the stairs, but after only a few steps he turned and said, “Okay, I’ve got it from here.” A short, get-away-from-me-now-someone-might-see-you side hug later, he was gone. And I was left standing, trusting he knows how much I love him, hoping he’ll remember everything.

 

And I can’t help but think of how He must feel – how He’s left standing, how He trusts I know how much He loves me, how He hopes I’ll remember the supplies, instructions He put in my bag, how He wants to stay with me, help me, see me grow and have fun, but sometimes I just give Him a half-hearted hug and say, “I’ve got it from here.”

I walk away from Him more than I’d like to admit. Through worry and doubt, fear and hopelessness I step further and further away, losing sight of my bags, losing sight of Him. And then I wonder where He went, why He left. But God doesn’t move; He doesn’t leave; He’s still standing there waiting.

Take heart. If you’ve stepped away, gotten lost, or can’t see Him anymore, just go back the way you came. Retrace your steps – you’ll find Him right where you left Him. He’s there waiting with open arms, ready to take you home.

Because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." - Hebrews 13:5b (NIV)

Sometimes the Numbers Do Lie

It’s funny how we let numbers define us. Age, weight, salary, pant size, blog followers, Facebook likes, re-tweets, checkbook balance, calories consumed, home square footage, books sold – the list goes on and on. It’s depressing, really, because each time I see the numbers, I’m reminded of what I’m not instead of who I am. And I hear his voice strong, hissing, “Deidra, those numbers don’t lie.” And while it’s true that according to his standards – the world’s measurements of success – my numbers are laughable at best, to me they are proof of God’s mercy.

I’m not a spring chicken; I’m not light as a feather; I make a grand total of $0 a month; my pants aren’t in the single digits; I have fewer followers than 90% of the bloggers I read; on a good day maybe 3 people will like my Facebook posts; I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been re-tweeted – in all-time history; my checkbook is a sad little place that has only a few dollars left after the bills are paid; no matter how many calories I don’t eat in a day and in spite of my exercise routine, I’m still a chunky monkey; and my house is unimpressive to say the least. And then there’s the big one: 454. I’ve given away more than I’ve  sold.

It’s the numbers that make me lose focus, get me off balance, convince me to assign a value to things that don’t really matter. But I don’t think Jesus is going to make my entry to heaven contingent upon my home size or bank account. He’s not going to tell me I’m too fat to fit through the gates. He’s not going to require 1,000 blog followers, and He doesn’t care about my Twitter feed. He helps me understand that those numbers, when manipulated and magnified, really do lie.

While to others my age means the best days are gone, to me it represents life he failed to steal through depression and suicide. To the world my weight and pant size are too much, to me it proves recovery from eating disorder.  To social networking experts, my followers, likes, and tweets reflect obscurity, to me they attest that others need my story. To marketers and agents 454 might be a joke, but to me it confirms a call.

Numbers can lie and they often do. Don’t use them to measure your value – they quantify but never qualify. You are of great worth. Your significance to God cannot be measured in corruptible terms.

Greener Grass and a Give Away

The grass won’t look greener on the other side if you keep yours watered. 

Their yard is always perfect. Always. Summer, winter, spring, fall – no matter the season, no matter the weather, it is immaculate. But the thing is, that’s all they ever do. They’re out there all the time spending every free moment mowing, fertilizing, watering, burning, weeding, blah, blah, blah. Who has time for that? And seriously, is the grass really so important that you would spend every spare second of your life manicuring and perfecting it? I guess if you like yard work it is. But I don’t like working outside. I don’t have a green thumb. I would like to have a lovely lawn, but I’d rather just pay someone else to do it. I want it to look great, but I don’t want to do all that work.

We often make the same excuses in our spiritual lives. We see the blessings of others, the fruit they produce and wish we had their gifts. But sometimes we fail to realize the amount of work, patience, and diligence that is required in order to yield those kinds of results. Just like the lawn, our lives have to be mowed, fertilized, watered, burned, and weeded. That means we have to be willing to endure being cut down to size, getting pooped on, getting rained on, being burned to get rid of the old and allow for new growth, and having all the weeds cut out if we want to produce at that level. We have to die to ourselves and let His Spirit work in us.

You can’t pay someone else to do it for you. You can’t just work every now and then and expect results. If you want to reap a harvest you have to do the work.  It is difficult at times, and most often it is painful, but if we will allow Him to prune us, trim off the rough edges, plant new in place of the old, we will produce lasting fruit.

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy , peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, lest us keep in step with the Spirit. – Galatians 5:19-25 (NIV)

**Give Away**

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What Lies Beneath

To your eyes unimpressive,

To your ears muffled, still,

To your  heart plain, ordinary,

To your mind senseless, dull

To your hands rough, uneven,

To your feet clumsy, inept,

To your soul foolish, imprudent,

To your spirit disordered, unkempt

But there is a part that remains unseen –

Fact the surface cannot reveal

A place no one can rightly judge –

The real, authentic me

To His eyes beautiful, pleasing,

To His ears forceful, pure,

To His heart remarkable, amazing,

To His mind intelligent, shrewd

To His hands soft, flexible,

To His feet ordered, steered,

To His soul wise, unstoppable,

To His spirit disciplined, renewed

The oustide foggy with smoke and screens

Rarely discloses truth,

So treat with kindness and dare not judge –

Only He knows what lies beneath.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” – 1 Samuel 16:7 (NIV)

Stuck

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.– Galatians 6:9 (NKJV)

Faithfulness is rarely glamorous – it’s mundane, routine, ordinary. Constant, persistent, and unremitting, faithfulness is loyalty in action. It requires energy and focus, commitment and resolve and it is not for the faint of heart. Sometimes, faithfulness feels like quicksand – gritty, thick heaviness that saps and pulls, making forward movement tedious and the destination a seemingly impossible dream. And it is there, in the mire of weariness, that we often become disillusioned and disoriented, fatigued and apathetic.

I’m stuck in that sludge. I lift my legs, try to move, only to realize that the force of my own energy is being used against me to suck me further down. It seems as though I’m working against myself, wasting the precious little I have left on deeds that go unnoticed, unappreciated. I’m waist-deep in the mud of tired and it feels like He doesn’t see. I lift my arms, wave, scream out, but my voice is gone, my arms noodle-limp; I bow my head in shame.

And just when I think I’m going down, another victim of this weary-in-well-doing slough, He throws out His word – the great rope of hope – and lassos me onto dry ground. Don’t lose heart, He says, your work is not in vain. You will reap at the appointed time.

That’s His promise to us –that if we keep doing good – His work – even when it seems like no one cares, even when we’re tired, even when we want to let go, even when others take our sacrifice for granted or mock our attempts, we will have our due season. Something that is due is expected to arrive imminently; is payable at once and on demand at a stipulated time; has met all the necessary requirements; and is owed a debt because of a right or an obligation. God’s word does not return void; what He says He will do. He cannot lie and is bound to His promise.

But we must do our part. There is no due season without our work. We cannot reap that which we have not sown. God is faithful. He knows, He sees, He cares. Others may forget or take for granted, but God is the rewarder of those who diligently seek – pursue, strive for Him.

Take heart today. Don’t be discouraged. We can rest on His promise. Your Father who sees in secret will reward you openly.

No Surrogate Promises

It’s very hard to sit still sometimes – to let God do His work His way. It is for me, anyway. I’m a doer, a planner. I want to fix things. I want to have a plan and execute it right down to the last period. No surprises, no waiting. I want it done yesterday. And perfectly. And according to my specifications. I like to be in control – no winging it or flying by the seat of my pants allowed. And when things don’t go like they should – how I planned – I have a tendency to try to make them happen, to force my solution onto what I deem as the problem.

But sometimes what I think is a problem really isn’t one. It’s actually a part of His plan – the greater plan, the one with no mistakes in it, the one mapped out before I was even born. He doesn’t need my help, but because I’m stubborn and nearsighted, I try to offer my assistance. Maybe He forgot because He’s really busy, so I’ll go ahead and get started on this. He can come and help me finish up.

Sarai did that – tried to make things happen on her own. She couldn’t have the children she so desperately desired, so she thought she’d help God out. So she said to Abram, “The Lord has kept me from having children. Go sleep with my slave; perhaps I can build a family through her.” – Genesis 16:2 (NIV) Translation: God won’t give me children, but I want them, so if He won’t give them to me, I will get them on my own.

Just 13 years later she conceived her own child. God intended for her to have a baby all along, but because she didn’t know, because she was more consumed with the way she thought things should go, because she could only see her life in that moment, she became frustrated and tried to create her own promise through someone else.

There are no surrogate promises with God. What He has for you will be built in you, not someone else. You alone can carry, nurture, feed, labor for, deliver, and raise the promise meant specifically for you. God knows the desires of your heart. He has good things planned for you – greater than what you ever expected. Don’t get so focused on your plans and desires that you forget about Him. Don’t try to force something that isn’t there yet. You are nearsighted – He sees all. Just because it’s not here right now doesn’t mean it’s not in your future.

It is my prayer today that God will help me, and you, to wait on Him – that we will not become so frustrated with our situation or so weary in well doing that we take matters into our own hands. God’s timing is perfect. There is a reason for everything. Your faithfulness will be rewarded.

Whatever God has promised gets stamped with the Yes of Jesus. In him, this is what we preach and pray, the great Amen, God’s Yes and our Yes together, gloriously evident. God affirms us, making us a sure thing in Christ, putting his Yes within us. By his Spirit he has stamped us with his eternal pledge – a sure beginning of what he is destined to complete. – 2 Corinthians 1:20-22 (MSG)

The Silence Not So Golden

It’s been said that silence is golden, but I don’t think it is – not for the listener, anyway. My experiences with silence are often black and thick and heavy, filled with question marks and peppered with commas – dreadful pauses waiting for their conjunctions to join the pieces together. So perhaps silence is golden only for the speaker – for the one disciplined enough to hold his tongue when silver speech would tarnish instead of shine, or maybe it’s gilded when covering ignorance – when offering no words is better than contributing unenlightened ones.

I am certain however, that this present quiet – my place of awkward unease – hasn’t the faintest flicker of gold. He hasn’t spoken. I’m not sure why, but it’s not because I haven’t asked. And just like all the times before, my first instinct is to scramble around, search for glimmers of sound, move to make my own noise. But I will not. There are lessons to be learned in silence – discipline that comes by obeying old commands.

I’ve learned that His hush does not indicate a lack of new direction, fresh purpose, or greater work that needs to be done; rather, it signifies that the current work is not complete, suggests there’s more to be done right here. Sometimes I grow weary and pray for answers out of restlessness because I’m tired of the place I’m in. I want to move because I feel bored or ineffective, because I want more, because the sound of constant motion seems better than still.

But I’ve learned when God doesn’t answer, He’s answering – through golden silence He’s speaking. He’s saying to keep doing the last thing He told me to do. He’s telling me this work’s not done. He’s re-stating His last command. And what appears to be no answer is actually the answer – the words I wanted to hear all along, the declarations I clamored for, the new insight I thought wasn’t there.

When God doesn’t speak, don’t move. Keep doing the last thing He told you to. When it’s time to move on He’ll let you know. Don’t let your personal sense of frustration or insecurity take you to a place He’s not. He didn’t say it would be easy or that you wouldn’t get tired or even bored or frustrated, but He did say He would give you grace and strength and that He would be faithful to complete the good work He has started. Listen closely. He speaks even in silence.

Silence never means that God is not there. He, of course, is always there. Silence is a test of obedience. It is an indication from God that it is now your turn to make the next move. A move, not based on the easy comfort of His overpowering presence, or the renewed leading of His Spirit, but rather, a move based on your already sufficient knowing of His will. The reason He does not speak is because He has already spoken.– Author Unknown

It Really is Possible

Your dream, your vision, those things you never thought you’d be able to do, the opportunities you’ve hoped for – they really are possible. How do I know? I lived my impossible, big, scary dream this week.

I never thought I’d have the courage to speak in front of a group, I never thought there would be people who were interested in what I have to say, I never thought I would have the chance to articulate (not just write) what He has done for me. This week God gave me that chance, and this week He showed up. He was strength in my weakness – He helped me choose courage over fear and doubt.

I don’t know if I’ll ever have another chance like that, and if God doesn’t provide one I’m okay with that. But now that I have seen, touched, held that piece of His promise in my hands, I don’t want to let it go. I want more. Because I discovered for myself this week, perhaps for the first time ever, that when we empty ourselves and truly depend on Him, He will make up the difference and do amazing things.

My little talk may not have been so inspiring and anointed that it changed every life in the room, but I know it changed one life completely and forever – mine. Through my obedience, through acting in spite of my fear, I found out something I never knew – I can. I really can do all things through His strength.

And so can you. Be open, be ready – you never know when your chance will come. God is good and faithful. He has great plans. He wants to use our scars to help others.

Those things used against us, the ones sent for the purpose of disqualifying us, those feelings of inadequacy and fear are often the very same things God turns around, uses to qualify us, to create the vehicle in which we will move forward, follow a new path into our destiny, and pick up others to come along for the ride.

“If you can?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes. – Mark 9:23 (NIV)

Write to Restore: Isolation

Quarantined, cut off, suffering alone – I lived that way for years. No one told me I couldn’t come, uninvited me to life; it was my choice. I had to stay alone, keep it to myself – who could possibly understand? All the people I knew wore clean clothes – mine had crusty pieces of vomit on them. Their outfits were white – pure and fresh, outlined with His yellow joy, crimson love. My wardrobe was drab, smeared with black, the red edging from my own blood, the yellow from fear.

He told me there wasn’t enough soap in the world, no water that could wash me clean. He said I must stay inside so nobody could see. And for a long time I thought he was right – I thought he was helping me. What I didn’t know is that he was lying, that every whisper, each idea was pushing me one step further away from reality and one step closer to his dark abyss.

He wanted me to be crazy. He liked it when I hurt myself. He laughed at my pain, mocked my weakness. He enjoyed having complete control over my mind. But one day when he wasn’t looking, Jesus came into my cell. He told me He could wash me and give me brand new clothes. He told me no one is perfect, that everyone has stains. He said not to worry about what others think – what He says is all that matters.

On that day I crossed the threshold of my confinement and slowly stepped into His light. He took my sin, He took my shame, He helped me start the long journey out. Little by little, step by step, day by day He never left my side. And He’s still here – cleaning, loving, helping, guiding, covering – giving me the courage to speak out, live in Truth.

Satan likes to isolate us – get us away from the group, tell us we’re inferior, keep us from others who need us or can help us – but we must remember that he is the father of all lies and there is no truth in him. You are not alone. You are not the only one. You do have meaning. You do have purpose. Other people do understand. There is none righteous, not even one, and there is nothing new under the sun. We all fight hard battles and need Christ’s love and grace to overcome.

Be encouraged today. Those things used against us, the ones sent for the purpose of disqualifying us are the very same things God turns around, uses to qualify us, to create the vehicle in which we will move forward, follow a new path into our destiny, and pick up others to come along for the ride. People need your story.

God uses scars to reveal His truth. Thomas believed and did great things for God after He saw Christ’s scars. But first he needed to touch the wounds, understand the pain, realize that the scars proved life and resurrection, healing and hope. Christ’s scars were proof of His suffering, evidence of God’s power, confirmation of His words, witness of His glory.

Our scars are the same – they prove our suffering, reveal God’s power, confirm His words, and bear witness of His glory. Never be ashamed of your scars – they are signs that point to Him.

No one is ever inspired by a person who seems perfect. – Lisa Whittle

You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. – Genesis 50:20 (NIV)

Fact Over Feeling

I used to live life based on my feelings. We all do that at times, and it is one of the biggest mistakes we make. It's nothing new – Satan has used our emotions and feelings to try to separate us from the truth of God since the beginning of time. Think back to the garden. Eve was tempted by the serpent to eat the fruit God told them not to. She was tempted by her feelings. She was the only woman on the face of the whole earth – no one else to compare herself to, no one else to tell her something was wrong with her – it was already a part of her, the way God made her that Satan used against her. He told her God lied. Satan told her God didn't want her to eat the fruit because it would make her like God – she would know good from evil. He played on her emotions, got her to doubt, made her question. Maybe I'm not good enough the way I am – the way God created me. I need to eat that fruit to make me better, wiser.

And of course, we all know the choice she made. Rather than taking God at His word, trusting His plan, believing that He wanted what was best for her, she took the bait. She, for whatever reason feeling she wasn't good enough the way God made her, chose to eat the fruit so she could be better.

And that same old trick still works on all of us today, thousands of years later because we still struggle with our feelings. And in the world we live in it is easier than ever. We have millions of people to compare ourselves to, a society that tells us we must look and be a certain way if we want to be successful and happy. We let our feelings drown out God's truth – what He says about us. And then we wonder why we're not happy, why nothing is ever good enough, why we have unsuccessful relationships, bad habits, why we live in the same old cycles and patterns.

It's because we are still making the wrong choice. I've done it all my life – listened to my feelings rather than His fact. I never felt good enough about anything, ever – that me, the way I was, the way He made me just wasn't good enough. Just like he did with Eve, Satan pointed out an area of inadequacy. And like Eve, I had to come up with a way to be better. I didn't talk to God first. I didn't ask Him what He thought, I didn't read His word, or believe His truth over my feelings. I made the choice to trust my feelings – to believe the lies. As a result I began the hardest struggle of my life. Over a period of months I became bulimic. I had been a Christian since childhood and knew God's word, but I never really, truly believed it. That's why it was so easy for me to fall victim to Satan's schemes. I believed my feelings more than I believed God's facts.

But thin never led to fulfillment, exercise never brought me peace, a smaller pants size never gave me joy. Those things only came when I truly believed in Jesus' love for me. When I treated the spiritual problem the right way – spiritually. We have to choose how to treat our problems and issues – with society's standards and pop culture values or with God's word. We have to stop making physical issues out of the things that are spiritual. We are left empty every time we seek to fulfill internal needs with external resources. Feelings are based on perception, circumstances, current location, and situation. Facts are based on truth and proven history. Feelings are fickle and temporary – they constantly change. Fact is permanent, cannot be changed, is solid and stable.

Living by feelings leads to fear, fighting, fluctuation, frustration, falsehood, famine, failure, and flesh. Living by God's facts leads to faith, freedom, fortification, fulfillment, focus, forgiveness, fertility, favor, and finish. We have to choose. The decisions we make show where our belief lies. Everything about us shows our faith, indicating what we believe and how we make our choices – by feeling or fact. Choosing to live by feelings tells God we don't need Him. It says that we trust ourselves more than we trust Him.

Scripture is filled with facts. God cannot lie and is only capable of truth. His fact tells us that He loved us so much He sent His son to die for us, that whoever calls on Him will be saved, that Satan is a liar and is defeated, that He will never leave us or forsake us, that He has cast out every fear, that we can have salvation, forgiveness, provision, strength, peace, hope, power, love, a sound mind, that He has good plans for us – to prosper us and to give us a future and a hope. You choose what you will believe and how you will act. You are in charge. You don't have to be ruled by feelings. Read His word and find out what He says about you, write down His promises, fill your head and heart with His words. Then when Satan comes at you using your feelings against you, you can quote Scripture – that's what Jesus did to defeat him – he has no come back for that – God always has the last word.

It takes commitment and vigilance. You can't fight if you're not prepared. It takes daily practice. We have somehow come to believe that struggling means we're failing, but struggle doesn't indicate failure – it indicates fight. It shows you're not giving up or giving in. It reveals your determination and character. It proves that you are willing to war against those forces against you. Choose to live in His fact over your feelings. Don't fight alone – fight with His armor. He works only for your good when you are committed and fully trust in Him.

The Day the Refrigerator Died

Tears stream and I think about the gray crown of her head as she leaned in far, digging, searching. Food, a treasure – I don’t know what she was looking for, but as I watched her tear through plastic black and green, I wondered if she ever imagined there would be a time that she, bare-handed, disheveled, would search through others’ discarded garbage seeking hope, fulfillment. But who ever imagines her life as it actually turns out?

Who ever dreams of thin places, dry moments – of the days when refrigerators die, washers stop running, stoves quit working, cars break down, sickness invades, or checkbooks bounce? Who ever envisions her husband leaving, her children acting out, her parents dying? Who would ever be okay with knowing that one day she’ll dig through dumpsters, all pride, cleanliness, sense of value gone?

But life happens, and sometimes it’s not all we dreamed. The tapestry woven of aspirations, desires often gets snagged on a tiny event and unravels quickly, leaving us with tangled puddles of vibrant life soiled from the dirt at our feet. And it is there, in that moment, that we must decide: pick up the fibers of hope and faith, or trample them as we walk away.

Often, the things we get snagged on, the occasions that stretch the threads of our very being are unexpected events, scenes never scripted into our dreams. But those are the incidents that matter most – the ones that create opportunity, the ones that reveal true strength.

Belief doesn’t walk away; it stays, picks up the strands, gives hook to the Master, trusts He weaves all things with grace and good, understands that sometimes unraveling makes opportunity for disentanglement and stronger knots.

My refrigerator died yesterday. Other things are going really wrong. My life doesn’t look like I want it to or feel like I need it to. Nothing is happening the way I planned. But, I refuse to fall apart because a few threads got pulled. I will believe; I will rest; I will be still and know that He walks on top of the waters I could drown in. What will you do when your refrigerator dies?

Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” – Matthew 14:29-31

Write to Restore: Empty = Full

I’ve fought it ever since that first day. I like to tell people it’s not really an issue any more, but that’s a lie. It’s a constant battle I’m engaged in, and it’s driving me to my knees. That part is good, I guess, because it’s from this humble position that our enemy is overcome, but I don’t feel like a winner. It seems as if my prayers bounce off the ceiling and land all around me, drowning me in their sea of unansweredness. I know He sees, I know He hears, and I know He cares, but He’s not saying anything. The silence is deafening.

It never occurred to me that I was fat.  I had just delivered three babies within 18 months of each other, so maybe I was too busy, or maybe I just didn’t want to look at myself, but until he pointed it out, it had never even crossed my mind. I’m not blaming him, but I often wonder if things would have been different had he not held out his hands, stretched wide as if carrying a large box, to inform me that he didn’t recognize me because I was, well, bigger than I used to be. Although his gestures and words were rude and socially unacceptable, in themselves they held no power. The work had already begun – I just didn’t know. In the grips of post-partum depression, I was held tight, squeezed of life, and barely able to breathe.

I didn’t know there was a name for what I had. I didn’t know other people suffered. I just knew something was really wrong and that I was powerless. The day his words came, slicing me open, releasing the deluge of pain, hurt, anger, sadness, loneliness, fear, and hunger – that was the day it started, the first time I heard Bulimia’s voice. He began with whispers and ideas, ones I thought were my own. Rational thoughts quickly changed to obsession, and within 3 months I was starving myself, taking 30 laxatives a day, throwing up, and vigorously exercising at least an hour a day, seven days a week.

I was so hungry – for love, for peace, for acceptance, for food – that I starved myself. If you’re thin they’ll love you, if you’re thin you’ll be happy, if you’re thin you’ll fit in. Empty will fill you up – that’s what Bulimia said.

Empty = Full. Full = Empty. That’s Bulimia’s math, his equation of lies.

Sometimes lies make sense. Laced with just enough truth to make us consider, they are the bait of Satan himself. Don’t fall for them, don’t drown in unanswered prayers. Put fact over feeling, and even if He isn’t speaking right now, it doesn’t mean He’s not there. Sometimes He doesn’t speak while He’s carrying us – He’s concentrating on lifting us out, using His energy to move us to the next place rather than spending it on words we may not listen to.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (Isaiah 41:10, 13 NIV).

Easter Memory

Many of them are gone now – my dad, grandparents, some aunts and uncles, friends. I think of childhood me, frilly from head to toe, hand in his, searching for treasures beneath the azaleas, seeking the prize hidden in high green. This was my favorite holiday. Even as a kid I understood somehow, knew this day was special.

I was happy about Jesus getting up, but honestly, I was more excited for me. On this day the dysfunction stopped. People smiled, seemed to get along. This event brought hope like no other. Maybe Jesus did that on purpose – allowing Easters to be calm, happy – because when I look back over all those years, it is the only time I can see simply good – good I will always associate with His life, sacrifice, triumph.

And isn’t that what Easter’s about – bringing out the best, rolling stones away, renewing, cleansing, resurrection? The hope of Easter is that it puts right all things wrong, makes opportunity for good to prevail, gives courage to believe. And that’s all we have to do – believe.

Because of Easter I will one day walk, hand in his, savoring God’s treasure, beholding the prize. That will be the best memory – that I once flawed, he once vile, we both sinful, broken – were washed in His grace, our stones rolled away, infused with resurrection power, made victorious through His sacrifice of love.

The angel said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said. Come and see the place where he lay.” – Matthew 28:5-6 (NIV)

Stretched

Every part is pulled taut, all elasticity gone. One more millimeter in any direction and I will begin to tear. Phone calls bring bad news, the checkbook robs Peter to pay Paul, my attempt at preparation seems so small, unworthy of the ears that will hear.

Inflexible, strained, extended – there is nothing left. And then I remember a lesson I heard once – that stretching may be ugly and painful, but it prepares us for strength and growth. It keeps us from injury when it’s time to perform; it allows us to move in ways that would otherwise be impossible. Stretching increases capacity and flexibility, reduces injury, decreases soreness. It improves balance and posture, increases nutrient supply and blood flow.

How I need those things desperately – strength, growth, flexibility, balance, posture – His blood flow over areas of lack; His nutrients of grace and love.

To stretch is to unfold, reach, expand, broaden, enlarge, and extend. Growth requires stretching – an extension of ourselves beyond current location or circumstances.

Stretching may be painful and awkward, but it creates opportunity – the chance to be more, do more than we ever could have without it.

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. – II Corinthians 4:17 (NIV)